I need you
Writing, reading, learning. Needing.
Studying, yearning, achieving. Seeking.
It was always your recognition I wanted to find.
Did it ever occur to you or cross upon your mind?
Wishing, hoping, wanting. Needing.
Believing, craving, longing. Seeking.
I desperately needed you to show me you cared.
I didn’t hear from you, did you forget that I was there?
Hurting, agonizing, crying. Needing.
Raging, hating, loathing. Seeking.
I searched deep within, looking for reasons to justify
Trying to find peace with your lack of wanting to try.
Failing, accepting, losing, admitting.
I will no longer have my heart vulnerable to seeking.
I see it more clearly now, the path you have chose.
It’s a shame, though I tried, it’s your loss I suppose.
My kids are growing up, as am I, as you know.
You know so very little, and soon enough, they’ll let go.
Your name will surely fade, all memories lost.
What should I tell them, are you prepared for that cost?
I wish you’d wake up, from your self-pitying recluse.
There is more to life than just cigarettes and booze.
I miss the warmth, your wit, our sarcastic word slinging.
I’d like your old self-back, no more wishful thinking.
I need you.